Exactly as my wife would?
Monday, February 16, 2009, 06:18 PM - Relationship Jokes
A man and a woman are in a lamaze class, and the woman is 8 months pregnant. In this class, the lamaze instructor is trying to get the husbands to understand what their wives are going through.All the men put on fake bellies, and the lamaze instructor walks up to the first man and drops a pencil in front of him.
"Okay, now pick up that pencil exactly as your wife would," says the lamaze instructor.
The husband smiles slyly. "You want me to pick it up 'exactly' as my wife would? He asks.
"Yes, exactly how your wife would," the lamaze instructor repeats, impatiently.
The man looks at his wife, and says, "Honey, pick up that pencil."
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I want to make this a perfect shot
Monday, February 16, 2009, 06:06 PM - Recreation Humor
A golfer stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity. Looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed and all the while driving his partner nuts.Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the darn ball!"
The guy says, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
The partner says, "Forget it, man, you'll never hit her from here!"
How many children do you have?
Monday, February 16, 2009, 06:01 PM - Miscellaneous Jokes
After many months of discussion, Bill and Betty finally decided to move to New York. When they arrived in New York they had great difficulty finding a suitable apartment to live in.Although many were big enough, the landlords always seemed to object to such a large family living there.
If only Bill wasn't so honest about the size of his family!
After several days of unsuccessful searching, Bill had an idea. He told Sarah to take the four younger children to visit the local cemetery while he went with the older three children to find an apartment.
After looking for most of the morning, Bill found a place that was ideal.
The landlord asked him, "How many children do you have?"
Bill answered with a deep sigh, "Seven . . . but four are with their dear mother in the cemetery."
He got the apartment!
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